Japanese raid of Carlos Ghosn’s house sparks international conflict as Romanian labelled palinka is found

Tokyo, Japan

An unexpected turn in the Carl Ghosn saga shocked the international community and brought the nations of Hungary and Romania on the brink of war. Following Ghosn’s escape from Japan, the Japanese authorities raided his home, only to find a 60° alcohol bottle in his secure vault, labelled “Palinka”. Sources close to the Japanese police were quick to leak the information to the press and once the news reached the Hungarian authorities, hell broke loose.

Zoltan Kovacs, spokeman and sometimes spokewoman for the Hungarian government, was quick to take the issue to Twitter:

“Shocking news from Japan, where so-called Romanian palinka was found. Unacceptable. We will retaliate. Soros mercenaries 1/100”

Palinka is a product registered by Hungary as a Protected Denomination of Origin (PDO) with the European Commission. The European Commission’s guidelines states that a Member State not complying with another Member State’s PDO is equal to a declaration of war. The Romanian authorities were at first caught off-guard, as the government officials were busy stealing money from the public budget and taking bribes. Also, no one in the Romanian administration had twitter so the information arrived by fax from the Romanian Embassy in Budapest.

“We have no idea what the Hungarians are all about and honestly no one had time to read Zoltan’s hysterical tweets. But as usual, we will just deploy the army at the Hungarian border and equip them with Palinka bottles. I mean with Palinka-like alcohol bottles.”

Meanwhile, Viktor Orban mobilized the 100-people strong Hungarian army and held a speech against “Soros Mercenaries”, sending them to the Serbian border to stop immigrants.

 

 

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