In its 6th and last assessment report, the Intergovernmental Panel of Climate Change (IPCC) marks a breakthrough in scientific research. After spending millions of dollars and decades of research and investigative work, IPCC has finally succeeded in pointing out the single most detrimental factor to our climate. And it’s George Soros. With 100% scientific consensus, the Hungarian-born billionaire is now claimed to cause most of our global warming. In exact scientific terms, he causes all of our global warming.
“It is indeed a breakthrough. For years we’ve been looking at what causes global warming and we could not put our finger on exactly what is it that triggers all this. But during he past 4-5 years we reshaped the way we do science, we started to get outside the silo, break the silo. We opened our eyes to what governments across the world are reporting and, voila!, it was right under our nose. George Soros!” said Abdalah Mokssit, IPCC Secretary General.
The IPCC report goes at length expanding on the exact activities that George Soros is systematically executing in order to destabilise our planet’s climate. He is now proved to have started wildfires in California and Greece each year. He attempted a coup on the corrupt Romanian leader Liviu Dragnea who then had to burn plane fuel to take shelter in Brazil. He got US President Donald Trump drunk and made him sign out of the Paris Agreement. Perhaps Soros’ worst action was whispering “liberal democracy” to Hungary’s PM Viktor Orban, who then turned red with fury and increased global temperatures by 2 degrees celsius.
As expected, Mr. Soros refused to comment the allegations. Sources from the Berlin Group said the reason of all his activities are related to finally getting global warming on Wallstreet and making money out of bonds.
Immediately after announcing that the US is pulling out of the Paris Agreement, Donald Trump launched a furious attack on world leaders for conspiring against his country.
“Last week I met with leaders of the top seven economies in the world, I met the EU leaders and they all lied straight to my face, all of them. They said there was a so-called Paris Agreement that the US had signed and should stick to it. I knew nothing about any agreement made by any of the Paris cities back home so I told them I will take some time to think about it. And guess what? It was all a great lie. Biggest lie ever” said an orange turned angry-red Donald Trump to the press on the Capitol Hill earlier today.
Berlin sources from within the Trump administration told us that it all started with FBI Director Comey. It is apparent now that Comey conspired with other world leaders to feed fake news to the Trump administration with regards to the so-called Paris Agreement, which Comey claimed it was a valid global pact. The President had his doubts about Comey and eventually fired the head of FBI after the latter publicly confessed being vegan and endangered national security.
“Once he returned back to the US, President Trump started calling all the Paris municipalities: Paris, Arkansas; Paris, Idaho; Paris, Illinois; anyway, all 9 of them. He even rang Paris Hilton to ask her if she was in any way involved in this. In the end, he was understandably furious.”
Donal Trump said he is not consulting with top generals and security advisors to see which is the next course of action for his administration. Economic sanctions for world countries and cease of trade to and from the US are very likely though.