North Pole, Mars
A new intergalactic survey launched by the Martians and funded by the Elves of Middle Earth lays blame on Tesla drivers as one of the biggest annoyance when it comes to public order and intergalactic highway conduit. It is the first year on record when BMW drivers are dethroned as the most annoying drivers. Tesla drivers also got the infamous WAG (“Wankers of the Galaxies”) award from the Alfa Centauri Committee on Egocentrism, Pain-in-the-assness and Trumpism (ACCEPT).
“It is clear that all the citizens of our intergalactic community had enough of Tesla. The drivers fall asleep at the wheel, that is when they’re not shamelessly stealing electricity from random satelliteyards without authorization. The cars are silent and you never know when they pass you at over-the-galactic-speed-limit; at least BMW drivers were also loud, so you could hear them coming from light years away”, said Al Manekeen Bush, lead-author of the survey.
The shares of the automobile giant plummeted on the Jupiter MoonStreet Stock Exchange, wiping out one billion Kergorians of its market value in only a few hours. Back on Earth, Elon Musk was reportedly devastated and did not tweet for a whole day. Close friend sources of The Berlin Group said he wanted to focus on spending some quality time with his son X æ A-12 watching the latest season of “Milky Way Friends”, the latest hit on GaxyFlix.